Two weeks ago, we took an look at the good ole stadium dwellers donning the uber-cool "#69" jerseys . Our chief fan hunters deduced that it was only officially "cool" to wear the #69 if your name is Beavis or Butthead, or if you're a fat, white, lineman.

We also noted that as we grow old in our ripe age 20-something, there may be some fads and trends that we miss from time to time. Fortunately, the #69 is still at the top of the douchebag list - just as it was 10 years ago when we were hip to all things obnoxious. But, not all vogue idiosyncrasies are absurdly obvious to the post-adolescent. We have to be on our toes these days as we tote the line between hip and douchebagery.

One thing's for sure: if I'm ever getting ready to leave the house - ballgame, high school reunion, or a night out on the town - and have to blow dry the ole mullet and trim my neg-burns...I will officially submit my resignation to the fashion factory.

"Simply put, the Negative Sideburn (or Neg-Burns as my brother calls them) is achieved when one elects to shave their sideburns above the ear line. Picture someone putting on a pair of glasses, then proceeding to take a straight razor and lopping off all hair beneath the ear piece. If you run across Neg-Burns in the wild, be cautious, as they are typically aggressive. You don’t shave your burns that high without an attitude to back it up."

Beautifully stated, Mr. Bacott.  But...we're not letting you ride out on a high note that easily.  No sir.  When this description was noted back in February 2006, you gladly posted a gratuitous picture of yourself sporting Neg-Burns.  I will do the readers of a service by displaying that photo here.