The St. Louis Sports Weekend, in Pictures…

17
Sep
2012

It’s time now for the digital phenomenon (read: 75% of our moms approve) known as the “The St. Louis Sports Weekend, in Pictures”. But you already knew that because the title of the column is located right above this. If you didn’t recognize that, then these simple pictorial recaps are even more up your alley.

Let’s do it.

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This season, we’re looking for the most ironic Rams jerseys. That is, sarcastic references to old Rams that fall under the umbrella of “terrible draft picks”. There are quite a few, so we expect Rams fans to continue submitting throughout the season. The first home game yielded a beauty: a #89 Eric Crouch jersey, after playing zero games for the Rams in 2005.

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The Rams roster is populated by rookies who are getting a chance to shine in the spotlight. One rookie is Rams punter Johnny Hekker and apparently, FOX doesn’t have an updated headshot for him. Either that, or he had a REALLY nice tan and some longer hair on team photo day.

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The Rams faced Scott Linehan’s offensive in Detroit during Week One and Jim Haslett’s defensive against Washington in Week Two. This Rams season is like a montage of former franchise sideline legends.

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We pause for a moment to recognize Redskins head coach Mike Shannahan, who is the first person in the history of the NFL to get sunburned in a domed stadium.

As an aside, are we just supposed to ignore the sweet irony of Mike Shannahan coaching a team named the “Redskins”. That would be like Jeff Fisher having a horn growing out of each temple.

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It was also nice for Rams fans to see London Fletcher again, who is approximately 78 years old but still a dominate force in the NFL. As he did in the Rams championship season of 1999, Fletcher goes by the nickname “dot com” – which is incredibly ironic considering he doesn’t even own the domain LondonFletcher.com.

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Danny Amendola spent most of 2011 injured, which meant FOX has plenty of comparison’s to New England WR Wes Welker backed up in their teleprompters. With 12 1st-half catches against the Redskins on Sunday, FOX went all out.

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Josh Morgan’s late unsportsmanlike penalty against the Rams was equivalent to stabbing your boss in the eye with a pen immediately after getting a promotion. It was stupid, impulsive and selfish.

But hey, St. Louis has a history of attracting knucklehead athletes named “Morgan”.

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Following Josh Morgan’s snafus that gave the Rams their first home opener win since 2006, Chris Long got a little expressive near the Redskins sideline. Awesome.

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On Friday night, Jose Canseco showed up to Dodger Stadium with the Cardinals in town. He was seated a few rows behind the Cardinals dugout, wearing a “Sorry for Everything, Mark” t-shirt. It was apparent reference to current Cardinals hitting coach, Mark McGwire. It was also an apparent apology from the younger half of the Bash Brothers crew. Eh, who are we kidding; it was a blatant attention grab.

The self-promotion continued on Saturday night, as Canseco rented a small plane and flew the following plane over Dodger Stadium.

Seriously, that’s real. Subtle.

But hey, it’s better than Canseco’s first sign concept.

We, of course, have exclusive access to the original artist’s rendering.

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It was announced late Sunday that Chris Carpenter will make his first start of 2012 on Friday against the Chicago Cubs. This comes nearly three months after having a “season-ending” rib removal surgery. If you’re not following along, a “rib removal” surgery is when a rib is removed from ones body.

Anyway, it sounds like a lot of medical jargon to us, so we decided to focus on creating a well-timed Chris Carpenter meme. Fell free to print it out and give it to lazy coworkers.

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Bo Hart was the featured guest on last week’s JoeSportsFan Show podcast. If you haven’t checked it out yet, we encourage you to do so. You may laugh once or twice. On the show, we chatted about what a “Bo Knows” Photoshop would look like in 2004. That is, if Photoshop was a little more pervasive.

Then we remembered that there was nothing stopping us from producing such a graphic today. Doesn’t technology rule?

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Early Monday morning, the power went out at KSDK in downtown St. Louis, causing the morning news to go off air for a few hours. That’s okay, you didn’t miss much. Allow us to recap.

The Cardinals & Rams both won this weekend and there’s murder & traffic everywhere. And it’s not raining yet, but it could. We’d put the chances at 50%. Oh, and no animals were born at The Zoo today. Now, a message from our sponsors.

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