JoeSportsFan

We have a question for Fox Sports and any other network that broadcasts the Super Bowl: what’s with the concerts? No, not with the singers and musical acts chosen to perform – we realize we’ll never understand that – we want to know what’s with the fans who seemingly showed up for a concert in the middle of a football game?

Who are these people, and why are they sprinting towards the stage like a pack of bulls is chasing them in Pamplona? Are they trying to convey that the fans just discovered Tom Petty in a heart-shaped stage in the middle of a football field? And when they get close to the stage, why are they jumping up and down as if they’re at a real concert? Are these people paying customers of the Super Bowl, or were they handpicked to be stand-in concert fans? Perhaps more importantly, are these people under the influence of hallucinogenic drugs?

Our guess is leaning towards yes, which would explain why tens of tens of people were jumping up and down for an Alicia Keys performance as if it was a Rolling Stones concert --- outside the stadium. When Paula Abdul, Willie Nelson and Alicia Keys are performing on a makeshift stage outside the Super Bowl and fans are continually jumping up and down at the same cadence regardless of what type of music is being played, we’re left to assume drugs are involved. The same goes for Tom Petty at halftime.

Pettyfans.jpg

On second thought, those people really don’t look like the type of fans we’d expect to see jamming out at the foot of the stage under the influence of drugs. Well, maybe except that guy with long red hair and the yellow shirt sticking his tongue out like a possessed monkey.



Crap that actually came from somebody’s mouth
"I'm not looking for contrarian arguments. I'm just saying what I think. I try to be the conscience of our show. Everybody tends to overreact to the news of the night. I try to sit back and see the bigger picture truth. You can ask anyone I work with, I'm going to say what I feel." – Skip Bayless

This is the same man who two weeks ago said Tom Coughlin’s decision to play his starters in Week 17 was the single dumbest coaching decision of all time. Either Skip is lying with his personal assessment, or he’s a huge moron. Or maybe both.
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TikiBook.jpg"Tiki was all about Tiki. I don't get why people make this so complicated. If he was still on the team, we wouldn't be here (in the Super Bowl). Trust me on that. It would be a different locker room. It's not a coincidence that he's gone and we're here. You're a fool if you think it is." – Anonymous Giants player

Clearly, ‘Anonymous Giants player’ is the typical football player. If he wasn’t, he would have retired to pursue a career in the arts and intellect and wouldn’t be wasting his time talking about Tiki.
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"I come to see a good game." - John Travolta at the Super Bowl

By “see a good game” he means “trump my ego and get more face time so people continue to talk about me while Fox tells everyone when my next crappy movie is coming out.”
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"They got their tails whipped and punched in the face!" – Sean Salisbury

That must have been a serious whipping if their tail got punched in the face.
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“I predicted the Giants would beat the Patriots. I did that because the Giants are a team of Destiny. Eli Manning isn’t very nimble. David Tyree is the number 4 receiver. This is destiny. This is meant to happen.” – Bill O’Reilly

Stick to news and politics, Bill.
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“The voice of the New York Giants, the one and only Bob Popper.” – New York mayor Michael Bloomberg, presumably speaking of Giants radio voice Bob Papa

See, this is what happens when politicians get involved in sports: they mispronounce the names of players and make everything awkward.
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Seacrest.jpg"We're going to cover it like a worldwide event and show its glitz and glamour. Celebrities look forward to the Super Bowl. Lots of important people walk the red carpet, and we'll be there to cover it as it unfolds.'' – Fox Sports Chairman David Hill

Just what the world needs – more opportunity to allow douchebag celebrities (and their douchebag leader Ryan Seacrest) to feel more important than they are. Thanks, Fox!
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“First Super Bowl I've watched on TV in 24 years” – Peter King
“This was one of those Super Bowls that didn't require my attendance to interpret.” – Peter King

Or perhaps any one of the last 24 Super Bowls could have been one that didn’t require Peter King’s attendance to interpret. How the hell would he know?
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“If he stays healthy the whole season, he's the comeback player of the year." – Eduardo Perez on Juan Gonzalez, recently signed by the Cardinals to a minor league deal.

All it’s going to take for Juan Gone to win the Comeback Player of the Year is to do the one thing that he hasn’t been able to do for damn near a decade. Shouldn’t be a problem.

Mercury Morris Isn’t Afraid of BOLD Statements
The most outspoken of the 1972 Miami Dolphins throughout the Patriots run at history was definitely running back Mercury Morris. Being borderline obnoxious is just part of being nicknamed after an element on the periodic table – just ask “Neon” Deion Sanders (‘Ne’ on the periodic table, +1 nerd points).

MerMorrisHelmet.jpgMorris squawked to anyone with a microphone about his team’s accomplishments 36 years ago, but when it came time to sweep aside all of the bravado and get his actual opinion on the Patriots, he wasn’t exactly competing with Jaworski on the hard core analysis:

“In all seriousness, they are as close as anyone has ever been to having a perfect season since we did. And this is the first team that has ever elevated itself to this position. They’ve had a lot of teams that have finished 11-0, 12-0, 13-0 but 18-0, by far, they are the only ones. They win won more game and they’re World Champions.”

Only someone who has experienced perfection can break it down like that.

Vitamin Water Allots Donovan McNabb Seven Minutes of Speaking
Following the precedent set last year during Super Bowl week, ESPN NFL Live and corporate America were kind enough to allow Donovan McNabb to speak. As a guest analyst alongside Sean Salisbury, Mark Schlereth and Trey Wingo, McNabb’s presence was sponsored by the fine people at Vitamin Water.

We aren’t sure if it’s a step up from last year when McNabb was brought to America by Chunky Soup, but it’s definitely a step down from Jimmy Johnson’s guest spot on ESPN when he was sponsored by Sam’s and MasterCard.

McNabb’s new sponsor wasn’t so much surprising as it was a foreshadowing of the deluge of cross promotion between advertising and the Super Bowl. Sunday NFL Countdown took home the award for most pointless ad-sponsored segment with the “Vantage Point”, sponsored by Vantage Point. No, it wasn’t Sal Paolantonio investigating an assassination, it was Sal talking about football… seven hours before the game.

And Fox wins the award for most profitable use of a studio broadcast, by inking deals with six different companies to sponsor various portions of the pre-game show and halftime show. Amp Energy Drink, State Farm Insurance, the racists at Salesgenie.com, and the Chevy 2008 Tahoe Hybrid hosted the pregame festivities at one point or another while Bridgestone Tire and SoBe Life Water tag-teamed the halftime extravaganza.

For the record, we thought the “Salesgenie.com Pre-Game Show” was waaay better than the “Chevy 2008 Tahoe Hybrid” version.

Bob Carpenter Memorial Snappy Line
Carpenter.jpgBob Carpenter may have found himself a soul mate in snap. Someone who knows how to take a snappy name and pound it into the ground week after week in a family friendly manner. Someone with whom he can share a cold glass of cherry Kool-Aid and swap trade secrets.

A few weeks ago, we documented Big 12 basketball announcer Dave Armstrong and his play on Mizzou forward Leo Lyons’ last name with the uber-clever “Lyons and Tigers, oh my!”.

Noticing that he had caught the Bobber’s eye, he kept going back to that well over and over again. Like last week when Mizzou played Colorado:

“Leo Lyons trying to growl a little for the Tigers.”

Or again this weekend when Kansas State visited Columbia:

“Leo Lyons and these Tigers right in it with the Wildcats. A real cat fight at Mizzou today.”

Not any old announcer can take Lyons, Tigers, Wildcats and mix them into a snappy potpourri that makes Bob beam with pride. Two thumbs up and a frosty mug of Kool Aid for you, Dave Armstrong.

The Media Circus is written by Josh Bacott and Patrick Imig. They have been sponsored by Josh Bacott and Patrick Imig. E-mail them at info@joesportsfan.com
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Jim Rome, February 7, 2008 09:02 AM
You gfuys suck my balls all of yous Chris Imig and Chris Bacott you stole my idea bitches.
TF, February 7, 2008 03:02 AM
Memo to Jim Rome: You suck balls.
Jim Rome, February 6, 2008 09:02 AM
Memo to JoeSportsfan: Stop being a parrot....running the same smack as The Pimp in the Box is not cool....coming up with an original idea shouldn't be very difficult....change your underwear daily....that is an original idea that you pansies have never had pass through your collective domes....
Patrick, February 6, 2008 07:02 AM
God, that makes me ill that we had the same idea as Jim Rome.
yellow shirt guy, February 6, 2008 06:02 AM
Don't be upset just because you weren't there live at the half time event of the century. . . Now where did I put those shrooms.
Mr. Redlegs, February 6, 2008 06:02 AM
Jim Rome did that same bit on the SB concert on his TV show yesterday, (yes, I am somewhat embarrassed to admit I watched, but in my defense, I was really high), using the exact same bit re: the running of the bulls.

Average minds think alike, or could there be something more nefarious afoot?
yellow shirt guy, February 6, 2008 06:02 AM
Don't be upset just because you weren't there live at the half time event of the century. . . Now where did I put those shrooms.
Patrick, February 6, 2008 05:02 AM
Few things in life make me smile as much as a profile picture of Bob Carpenter.
Scott Peterson, February 6, 2008 05:02 AM
Mercury got those guns when he was doing time in the penetentiary for drug trafficking. Props to him for maintaining them in these years after his release.
Jeremy Schaap, February 6, 2008 03:02 AM
"he sort of made me lose a little more respect for him..."

Uh, JB...does this mean you actually had 'some' respect for him? Skip Bayless is a microcosm of everything that is wrong with ESPN and sports 'reporting' in general...at least Woody Paige realizes he's a court jester (well, not always)...Skip just belts out opinions and platitudes on sports like he's discussing Iranian nuclear disarmament. There is nobody, outside of Berman, that I'd rather see whacked with a tire iron than Skip...
TF, February 6, 2008 03:02 AM
The picture of Mercury Morris looks like a total photoshop job. If those guns really are Morris' real arms, then I might just let him slide on all the s-talk.

Also, Tiki is an entire bag of douche.
JB, February 6, 2008 02:02 AM
Yeah, he said it. Although I didn't know it was possible, he sort of made me lose a little more respect for him when he claimed that he didn't purposely craft his opinions to be contrarian for the sake of argument. Either he's really delusional or he thinks the entire audience is filled with freaking morons.
truthaboutduke.com, February 6, 2008 12:02 AM
Skip Bayless didn't actually say that, did he? I mean the man eats, sleeps, and breathes overreaction.

Lenn Sakata

Lenn Sakata become a Baltimore folk hero when he set the Orioles clubhouse record on both Dig Dug and Galaga during a single rain delay in 1985.

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