Due to this edition of the Circus being rather full on content, we’ll use this space to reflect back to the knee-jerk reactions of the mainstream media in placing Rex Grossman on a pedestal after a few good games to start the season.

"I think, at some point right before training camp, Rex Grossman had an arm transplant from Dan Fouts.” – Peter King after Week 2

“The Bears have a legitimate top-level quarterback in Rex Grossman” – Vic Carruci, 10/1

”He has some Brett Favre in him, but he’s a winner.” – Jerome Bettis 10/1

”He’s seems like a Brett Favre kind of guy.” – Chris Collinsworth 10/1

”You know what somebody told me earlier this week?  Is that he has some Brett Favre in him.   I’m not saying he’s Brett Favre, but he does have a little of that in him.” – John Madden 10/1

"Rex Grossman right now is the MVP of this league!” – Sean Salisbury 10/2

You just can’t make this stuff up. 

Crap that actually came from somebody’s mouth
”The one thing you do not want to do against the Colts is give up that big pass play… well, any team… but especially the Colts.” – Phil Simms

This just in… NFL rule change says Colts offensive plays are now worth TWICE AS MUCH.
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”Peyton Manning sticks it in Joseph Addai’s stomach and pulls it out better than anyone… he sticks it in, and pulls it out.” – Ray Lewis

You’d think a man who was once accused of stabbing another human to death would avoid the phrase “stick it in his stomach and pull it out.”
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”The Colts like to run what I call a stretch play.” – Phil Simms

That rushing play you’ve seen the Colts perfect the last 8 years?  That was coined by Phil Simms.

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”They had 19 plays in the first half, that’s tough… it wouldn’t have mattered if Brady was on the team… tough to get into a rhythm… Rex couldn’t get started with only 19 plays in the first half.” – Sean Salisbury

Sean, did it ever occur to you that maybe Rex was part of or most of the reason the offense had only 19 plays in the first half?
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”I am so proud of (Tony) and Lovie.” – Sean Salisbury

When you hear Salisbury speak about the coaches of the Super Bowl teams, you’d think he raised both of them.
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”As an African American coach, what did it feel like to hoist that Lombardi trophy?” - Sal Paolantonio

Sal later asked Tony what it’s like as an African American head coach to drop a deuce in the locker room.
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”Grossman didn't play well, but he didn't cost the Bears the game. He never had the chance.” – Clark Judge, sportsline.com

Are we really to believe that Grossman didn’t cost the Bears the game?  Considering one of his interceptions led directly to 7 points (at a time when the Bears were down only 5), we’re going to say yeah, Grossman did cost his team the game.  Perhaps “not getting the chance” really means, “didn’t make enough plays to warrant clock -sustaining drives”.
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”There are real events to look forward to- the combine, the draft, minicamp, training camp.  No other sport has that.” – Mike Golic, on why the NFL off season is superior to other sports.  

True, Mike, no other sport has training camps or drafts.  Those are exclusive to the NFL.  And FYI, only meatheads look forward to minicamps.  
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“But the truth is Manning stunk in the playoffs. We’re literally talking about the worst playoff run by a Super Bowl-winning quarterback in the history of the league. Go check the record books... Rather than sweet-talking Manning and over-hyping his positive impact on the field why not stick to something closer to the truth?”  – Jason Whitlock, AOL Sports

Jason Whitlock – voice of reason.
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“I'da missed hearing an early "leaked" version of Kanye and Common's "Super Bowl Hustle" song where Com dropped the sic line, "I'm tellin' you like Jennifer Hudson." – Scoop Jackson

That line by Com was so sick that Scoop had to leave off the ‘k’.  And, as we all know, that means it’s extra sic. 
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“Cirque de Soleil - Personally, I would have loved to have seen Brown, Esiason, Marino, and Sharpe parachute into the stadium to start the broadcast. But you can't help admire the athleticism of this modern circus. Grade: A-“   - Richard Deitsch, SI.com

When a media critic gives an A- to the pre-game trainwreck that featured people riding fake ostriches, carrying inflatable alligators and pretending to be butterflies (just a reminder: this took place at a football game) it’s pretty clear that he’s not speaking for the average sports fan.
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Media Rant – 5 examples why we dislike Peter King’s Monday Morning QB column

All things considered, Peter King is probably one of the most notable and respected football writers in the country.  He has been around forever in print and has recently expanded his TV duties from HBO’s Inside the NFL to NBC’s “Football Night in America”. 

With his extra curricular activities around the world of football increasing, his staple column, the Monday Morning Quarterback on SI.com, has started to resemble a rambling sports gossip rag.

This week’s post-Super Bowl version was a perfect example of why it has become a regular source of Media Circus fun.  It included a little of everything that the MMQB has come to represent – name dropping, over dramatization, pontificating, random opinions on non-football items, and his staple - a smoldering love affair with Brett Favre.

Name Dropping: “Spent some time on Friday night with Archie, Cooper and Eli Manning. What a good family. Ever been with Cooper? I mean, I thought he was going to put a lampshade on his head at any moment.”

If you doubt our claims that Mr. King derives significant joy from name dropping, we present to you, Exhibit A.  “Ever been with Cooper?” All that was missing was the “…well, I have.”

Over Dramatization: "Champions play like it isn't raining when it is."

No truth to the rumor that, in honor of Peyton Manning’s game Sunday, King is getting this phrase painted on his office wall so that he can touch it every time he starts a column. 

Pontificating: “Marvin Lewis, I'm told, quite reliably, that a few of your lads were in a place on South Beach called the Jersey Diner Friday morning around 5. Yes, Friday at 5 a.m.”

No f-ing way! You mean members of the Cincinnati Bengals team were out eating at a South Beach diner at 5:00 am?  Memo to Pete – unless they were wielding weapons or taking bong rips while eating their bacon and eggs (which we concede is a good possibility), there is nothing wrong with this.

Random opinions on non-football items: "Saw one commercial -- the talking lions on the Taco Bell spot -- and thought it was brilliant."

Normally we hear about colonoscopies, snooty Starbucks workers or the fact that House is the greatest single television show ever produced.  This week, it was “brilliant” Taco Bell ads.

Smoldering love affair with Brett Favre: "I love how Favre announced he was coming back on the Friday of Super Bowl week, and told the local paper in town. That is so classic Favre. He picked the time where the world would be most focused on something else, so he could get the minimum amount of attention. Beautiful."

There is no way to describe the collective reaction of the Joe SportsFan staff when we read this.  If we didn’t know that King has a massive man crush on Favre, we’d think it was pure sarcasm.  To us, media junkie Favre announced his “return” when the entire world was talking about Peyton Manning precisely so that some of the spotlight would shine on him, but what do we know.

We’re looking forward to next week’s MMQB where King will presumably dedicate a few paragraphs about when he ran into Marvin Lewis at the local Dunkin Donuts and had a riveting conversation about the time he and Brett Favre watched an episode of House together where Hugh Laurie and Omar Epps treated a patient who had suffered from a rare colon disease caused by repeatedly eating at a diner later than 10:30 pm.

Salisbury’s Monkey
In his moment of triumph knowing that Peyton Manning had just won the Super Bowl, Sean Salisbury alluded to the monkey finally leaving Peyton, albeit in a perverted tone…

“Well the monkey fell down to his waist after last (week)… still hanging on a little bit but now it’s completely gone.”

Along the lines of the Ray Lewis comment in the crap section, you’d think the angry benchwarmer who takes cell phone pics of Mr. Pickle wouldn’t revert to such questionable and sexual commentary.  Henceforth, we declare that the monkey is still on Senor Angry’s phone.

If only Blair Underwood could speak for Art Monk
“St. Louisans, give Bernie Miklasz a very big hand this morning. If not for the convincing case made by the St. Louis Post-Dispatch columnist, Roger Wehrli would not have made the Hall of Fame on Saturday.” – Peter King, SI.com

This isn’t to rip King for this tidbit or to criticize Miklasz who clearly did an admirable job with presenting the case of former Cardinal cornerback Roger Wehrli.  But isn’t this a bit of an indictment on the voting process of the NFL Hall of Fame? Seriously, there are people who went into the weekend not set to vote on Wehrli only to change their minds after listening to a speech from a writer?  Do these voters do any research on their own or are they just sitting back, sipping whiskey and waiting to be swayed? 

Until we hear otherwise, we’re assuming that the voting process for the Hall of Fame is like the NFL media’s version of LA Law, with each side laying out their case to an impartial jury complete with witnesses, exhibits and random appearances of Benny.  Only in this version, the courtroom smells way worse. 

Bob Carpenter Memorial Snappy Line
Coming off a championship weekend, Bob Carpenter is usually in a very generous mood.  Even obvious quotes from an announcer vying for his third consecutive snappy induction would merit consideration.  But to no avail, Neil Everett’s ”A guy named Saturday leading (the Colts) on Sunday,” doesn’t make the cut. 

Neither do the countless online sources who crafted beautiful plays on words such as “Championship Rain”, “Raining Champions” and “Peyton’s Rain”.  That’s because the Carpenter Memorial is taking a sabbatical to the shelves until further notice.

The reason: Bob Carpenter is pissed.  He’s seething that Jim Nantz failed to cap off the Super Bowl with a snap-filled cheesy pun.  No “Peyton’s the Manning” or “there will now be a trophy down in that Dungy”. 

Nothing. 

The man who ended past NCAA title games with “Juan shining moment”, “Simon says championship”, and “It started in March, it ended in April, and it belongs to May” gave nothing to the Carpenter Memorial. 

Double middle finger and a special message from Robert C: You f**king suck. 

The Media Circus is written by Josh Bacott and Pat Imig.  They swear this stuff is real.  All of it – except the part about Robert C. losing his cool.  Email them at info@joesportsfan.com