At some point during the summer, even the biggest of sports fans can get a little bored. With no football and
the baseball season only a fraction of the way through its 162 games, things can get a little tiresome. That’s why every four years the World Cup is a beautiful change of pace.

This year’s tournament kicks off June 9th and you can catch all the action on ABC and ESPN (and lucky for some, every game is in HD). That said, it’s time to preview what we can expect from the World Cup media (teams announced as of yesterday).

Number One Team: Dave O’Brien and Marcelo Balboa
O’Brien will hold play-by-play duties for ABC/ESPN’s number one duo. You may recognize him from baseball duties, as he has teamed with Joe Morgan, Buck Martinez, and Rick Sutcliffe in the past on ESPN. While we’re not sure what kind of soccer knowledge he possesses, we’re pretty sure he’ll get through it alright, considering he’s had to deal with Morgan and Sutcliffe.

His partner Marcelo Balboa is a former US national player. More importantly, he looks like he’s a member of the Taliban with a mullet/greased look that would make Bin Laden jealous. Needless to say, we’re eagerly looking forward to games broadcast by these two.

Second Team: JP Dellacamera and John Harkes
Dellacamera has been around for a long time now, signifying a solid play-by-play career. JP is likely the only man on the team who can claim that he’s announced an 80’s MISL game between the Cleveland Force and the New York Arrows. He broke into the soccer business when names like Steve Zungul and Tatu ruled the Astroturf pitch. And if that’s not enough, his last name is Dellacamera and that’s kind of intriguing since you know, he’s on TV (boo us).

Much like the above-mentioned Balboa, Harkes is a former US national player with much of that time spent as team captain. On a more interesting note, he went over to England to extend his soccer career and inexplicably came back with a British accent. No word on whether he’s shaken it yet.

Studio Show Analysts: Eric Wynalda, Alexi Lalas, Julie Foudy
All three studio analysts are former players, with Foudy starring on the women’s World Cup team. Of course of these three, you might be surprised to hear that it was Wynalda who once did commercials for Pert Plus. We’re looking forward to checking out the fullness and body of his hair. Alexi Lalas qualifies as the “bad boy” of the studio cast, a title he achieved solely by having a wild red goatee in his playing days.

So to conclude, not only can we look forward to World Cup soccer this summer, but we get to watch a former player turned Taliban look-alike, a former American turned Brit (speaking of accent, of course), a former shampoo endorser and a guy who looks like Carrot Top.

And oh yeah, the studio guys are going to perform demonstrations on a mock soccer field so for those of you who have always wanted to see Alexi Lalas play soccer in a suit, your wish has been granted. No word if the mock field will be taken to the streets of Time Square.

We can only hope so.

Crap that actually came from somebody’s mouth
“If the season ended today, John Rodriguez would end it hitting .424 – tied with Rogers Hornsby.” – Wayne Hagin, WB 11

We’re going to say that Rogers is probably safe.
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”It’s guaran-Sheed.” – usatoday.com
“Guaran-Sheed: Wallace guarantees Pistons will top Cavs.” – ESPN.com

Never underestimate the snappiness of the headline writers.
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“If you think it’s butter and it’s not, it’s Dwayne Wade.” – Stu Scott

We’re as confused as you.
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“I know the games have been going on for nearly a month, but just as the golf season doesn’t really begin until the Masters, the baseball season doesn’t really begin until the Yankees and Red Sox get together.” – Mike Celizic, msnbc.com

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, we present to you Exhibit A in the confirmation of the “East Coast Bias”.
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“I think this is why Carl Banks is becoming a very good radio analyst and why Sirius' NFL Radio channel is lucky to have him. I asked him what he thought of the LaVar Arrington signing. He liked it, sort of. "I like LaVar,'' Banks said, "but, to me, he's about 50 percent of what he should be. He's got to be more productive than he's been.'' Banks said he doesn't know if the Giants will be able to get Arrington's potential out of him.” – Peter King, SI.com

If you’re considered a “good radio analyst” because you can accurately point out that LaVar Arrington wasn’t as productive last year as he should have been, then we got a ton of burgeoning radio superstars out there.
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“Memo to all the baseball players who voted in the Sports Illustrated poll of players and said Derek Jeter is baseball's most overrated player: You've gotta be kidding.” – Peter King, SI.com

If we were to rank the people who are qualified to determine whether a baseball player is overrated, we’re going to put baseball players right at the top of the list. About 750,000 spots down on that list is Peter King, football writer for SI.com.

Are You Ready for Some Football?
As has been documented in the past, the Worldwide Sports Leader is content in shoving Monday Night Football down our throats. As part of that campaign to choke us beyond levels of enjoyment, classic MNF moments have been airing every day on SportsCenter. Media Circus staff members documented three moments from last week and they included:

-- A Bears player returns a punt for a touchdown
-- A fan flips off the camera
-- Dennis Miller joins the booth for 2000 and 2001

Nothing screams classic football moments better than a fan flipping off a camera and Dennis Miller using big words. Man, we’re so ready for football.

The Media Rant - Fun with the Rick Sutcliffe Transcripts
By this point, the exploits of a completely bombed Rick Sutcliffe on the San Diego Padres TV broadcast last week have been well documented. The audio and video of the event were sent out to the masses via Deadspin.com (the audio courtesy of gaslampball.com) and have officially made Rick Sutcliffe the most entertaining baseball color man on the ESPN roster.

Furthering his standing in the eyes of The Media Circus, Sutcliffe granted us the rights to the first exclusive interview since his incident.

The Media Circus: Rick, we’re honored that you chose us to discuss your drunken on-air ramblings in San Diego last week. We heard Graham Bensinger was chomping at the bit for this interview, but you decided to grant it to…

Sut: How good is this?

TMC: Rick, you’re talking to your beer again. Look up here at me. Okay, that’s better. So, Mr. Sutcliffe, thanks for taking time out of your schedule to meet with us. We’re sure you have a lot of apologies to write in addition to the normal hectic schedule of beard trimming and settling overdue bar tabs.

Sut: It’s not that busy, man. It’s not that busy…

TMC: So, when you wake up in the morning and think to yourself “today I want to get completely annihilated and make an ass out of myself in front of the entire baseball watching nation” who is the first person you call?

Sut: He’s here. He’s in the house tonight. Bill Murray.

TMC: It seems like, from your slurred speech and rancid breath that you might be a little intoxicated right now. Are you drunk?

Sut: I’m not far away. I’m here all the time. 

TMC: I can’t help but notice that you’re wearing a Panama City Spring Break 2006 shirt today. Does that mean that you actually went on spring break this year?

Sut: [chuckles] The best city in the world. Where is it? Right here, man. You can’t beat it.

TMC: Switching gears now. Rick, if you could have man-on-man relations with one movie star, who would you choose?

Sut: George Clooney. You been readin’ about all that?

TMC: I don’t read US Weekly magazine, but Clooney is certainly handsome. So Rick, there are a few similarities between your appearance on the Padres broadcast and Joe Namath’s sideline interview a few years ago. Granted you didn’t try to make out with either of the people interviewing you like Joe did, but how do you view yourself in comparison to Namath?

Sut: Yeah. He’s up there with um... he’s up there with the Congress. He’s trying to get everybody… to go over there... and solve that thing.

TMC: And by “that thing”, I assume you’re referring to stiffer penalties for people who show up on TV broadcasts completely s-faced?

Sut: Matty! What’re you still doing here in San Diego?

TMC: Rick, don’t you think it’s a little odd that you’ve given your beer can a name and are currently having a conversation with it?

Sut: Everybody on Earth has been trying to steal you.

TMC: No one is trying to steal your drink. In fact, it’s 11:30 am; you’re the only one drinking.

Sut: What’re you still doing here?

TMC: Well, Rick you passed out in your chair again…

****Actual Sutcliffe Transcripts ****

Sean Salisbury is Angry at You
The legend of Senor Angry amazingly continues to grow – even during the off-season. Special thanks to Steve B. for relaying this story via email to Media Circus headquarters last week.

Subject: Salisbury is Angry w/ Golf
I can tell by your website that you really like this guy and the segment "Sean Salisbury is angry..." coupled w/ his TV antics indicates that he doesn't have a bad temper what-so-ever.  SO here it is: 

A couple of the guys from my office played in the Joe Buck charity golf tourney yesterday.  One of the guys in their group shanked their shot to the next fairway and came close to Salisbury's group.  He got the stare down from Sean himself as he went to retrieve his ball.  Later on, they were talking to one of the guys in the group and apologized about the bad shot and Sean's partner reassured them there was no harm no foul.  His partner proceeded to tell them that Sean had broken 7 clubs during the round because of bad shots he hit.  Not only is it hilarious that someone would actually break 7 clubs in one round but the fact that it's this guy makes it even better.
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We would have paid about a year’s salary to see that Salisbury stare down