As a tribute to his 12 year career at ESPN, we went into the vast pool of Media Circus archives and grabbed some choice Salisbury cuts.  If you're wondering the validity of any of these, may we direct you to the JSF search result page for "sean salisbury", and you can have a ball searching yourself.  You’ll likely complete your reading midway through June.   

In case you didn’t see the updates in the Media Circus, Salisbury’s contract expired with ESPN.  Instead of re-upping, he’s going to try and become an even bigger “superstar”.  This quote from the LA Times pretty much sums up Salisbury in a nutshell…

"I'd grown tired of being punished for not being an NFL superstar. Analysts who don't work as hard as me, don't prepare as hard as me, and don't have my resume were making more than me just because of their ability to throw or catch a football.  Don't get me wrong, I appreciated the opportunity ESPN gave me, but they had capped my ceiling. There was only so far I could go there.” 

He was and is, in fact, completely delusional.  The man was absolutely driven by the fact that he wasn't a superstar in the NFL.  To him, being on TV was his chance to be a star, and to prove all those naysayers wrong.  What a sad, pathetic existence.  But it’s an existence that we’ll forever celebrate. 

There's plenty of Salisbury for everyone.  And what follows is a sampling of why Sean Salisbury was, um, whatever he was.  If we were to actually comb out every Salisbury quote we’ve ever documented, the printed version of this post would run your company’s paper supply dry.  

Here here, for Sean!

Undying Passionate Love for Brett Favre
Like most elite media members, Sean Salisbury absolutely loves Brett Favre - and he's damn proud to proclaim it.

“I love Brett Favre, I really do.  I know it sounds cliché but I love the guy.”

“Brett Favre is everything that is good about football.”

“There’s not a family out there who is tougher than the Favre family.”



"If you've got a problem with Brett Favre, GET OVER IT!"

"You give me a leader, and I'll show you a winner.  You give me a coward, and I won't show you Brett Favre!"

Unmitigated Anger
The lifelong benchwarmer has had pent-up aggression and he's been unleashing it ever since he retired.  Lucky us.  We will, however, give him credit for being equal-opportunity when it comes to dishing it out.

Directed at the People
“People, can we just put to rest that the Oakland Raiders are contenders.  They aren’t.  Now get over it!”

“If you didn’t draft Larry Johnson in your draft, you don’t know fantasy football period, anyway!”

“People… STOP.  Corey Dillon is not over the hill because last year he rushed for what, sixteen to seventeen hundred yards and all of the sudden he forgot how to run?  Get over it!”



Directed At Himself and his Colleagues
“If you remember at this time last year, what were we all saying?  ‘Man, did the game pass (Joe Gibbs) by?’ or ‘Boy, they look confused…what’s going on, did he forget how to coach?’  NO!!! He didn’t forget how to coach, it just took a while to get back in the flow!”

Directed at NFL Teams and Players
”If (the Cardinals) draft Adrian Peterson, then they just don’t get it!”

”First of all, the Chicago Bears management needs to wake up, and quit being so tight!  I got a major, major issue with that!  If you rob Peter, you’re gonna have to pay Paul!!!"

The MVP Debate
For reasons we’ve never clearly identified, Sean Salisbury is absolutely obsessed with predicting the NFL MVP... even before the season starts.  Take a gander at his All-Pro 2006 campaign, in which Sean started his train of MVP debates in June; you know, when teams hadn’t even broke for minicamp. 

June, 2006:“(Larry Jonshon) is this year’s MVP!”

September 2006: “I think (Tom Brady is) going to be the MVP of the league this year.”

October 2, 2006:  “(Donovan McNabb) right now, along with Rex Grossman, has to be the frontrunner for the MVP.”

Minutes later, October 2, 2006:“Rex Grossman right now is the MVP of this league!”

Seconds later, October 2, 2006: ”Tommy Harris (is) the defensive MVP this year"

October 31, 2006: ”(Peyton Manning) is the MVP of the league right now.”

October 31, 2006: ”(Michael Vick’s) going to chase Manning for the MVP this year!”

According to our detailed notes, Salisbury’s rants on the 2006 MVP race resulted in 9 players being mentioned as candidates, 3 players mentioned for “Defensive MVP” (an ward which doesn’t exist) and 17 quotes we documented where Salisbury mentioned someone winning the MVP

Confusing Head Shakers and Awesome Contradictions
2005
In one sitting during one NFL Live episode in the winter of 2005, Salisbury unleashed a never-before-seen barrage of contradictions and head scratchers.  Witness the genius of double-speak.

"(The Chargers) might be the second best team in the National Football League." – who were 8-4 at the time and finished 9-7

"(Seattle) might be the most complete football team in the NFL."

"I think (the Seahawks) belong but probably in the middle or end of the sentence.  The Colts are the sentence."

“(The Seahawks) are the best team in the NFC, but the Panthers are still the favorite.”

"I picked (the Colts) to lose one or two games, but now I'm a believer.  They will go undefeated!"

So we went from Seattle being the most complete team in football, to them being behind the Colts (but in the same sentence as "best team"), to Seattle not even being the favorite in the NFC.  Suck on that.  And 3 weeks later, he dropped this bombshell...

"The Patriots may just be on their way to their third Super Bowl in a row!”

2006
During training camp in July, Sean had this to say about Super Bowl XLI:
“It’s a 3 to 4 point game.”

Months later, he fell in love with Tony Romo...
“All Tony Romo does is win.”  - 1st week of December

But he would soon backtrack...
“Tony Romo has only started 9 games so let’s cut him some slack and stop calling him Roger Staubach.”  -4th week of December

And in case you were wondering how good the would-be NFC Champion Bears were, Sean wasn't about to leave you hanging...

“I think (the Bears) are capable of winning on the road, but it all depends on where they go on the road before they win that game.” 

“I would take the Colts on a neutral site, but the Bears are the better all around team.”

2007
Salisbury invented a new statistic for November's battle of the unbeatens, between the Colts and Patriots...

"I'm gonna go with the Patriots slightly and not because they're playing better but because I think their confusion is more.  We know that the Colts are gonna give you 2 Deep.   Come down with Bob Sanders once in a while.  You know where they're gonna line up.  The Patriots create all kinds of confusion and confusion means turnovers, turnovers mean short field.  Slightly the Patriots because of confusion."

Closing Statement
”Don’t read or listen to anything we say.”

In the end, Salisbury’s legacy will be greater than any ESPN NFL analyst before him.  It’s just that said legacy is for reasons which the loud mouth never intended.  In a way, we'll kind of miss him.  But he'll forever be a part of this site and the sports blogosphere.

Like right here.   

Here. 

And here.