As soon as Mark Derosa finished signing his name on a three-year, $13 million contract with the Cubs, it became quite evident that this offseason in baseball is going to produce some incredibly absurd contracts.  Although it does have a lot to live up to (A.J. Burnett led the way last year with his $55 million, 5-year deal), the 2006-2007 signing period has the definite potential to go down as the most insane of all-time.  Let’s all root together for that to happen—it makes things much more entertaining, and perhaps, just perhaps, we could see another Mike Hampton deal, where half the league ends up paying some of that 60-year, $3 billion contract’s dollars.  The perfect storm is brewing—not too many great players, lots of teams with needs and money, and a couple of guys working off of playoff bonuses.  But which guys will end up getting the craziest deals?  The ones that are worth phone calls about?  The Top 7 investigates:

7. Jeff Suppan
After signing his deal this winter, Suppan will have been to both extremes.  The three-year deal that he just played out with the Cardinals was one of the top bargains in baseball.  Starting next year, his new team’s fans will be wondering why they are giving $10 million to a guy with few strikeouts and an ERA over 4.

6. Jason Marquis
Someone will sign him.  (And Cardinal fans will laugh hysterically). 

5. Julio Lugo
Yesterday was his birthday!  Happy 32nd birthday, Julio!  Your gifts are being the only shortstop available when teams are happily passing out money to anyone who has ever shown a tiny bit of major league ability…and a tasty cake.

4. Juan Pierre
If you want to see singles, no walks, and the ball rarely hit out of the infield, locking Pierre up for five years in a fine idea.  If you don’t, hope your team isn’t the one duped.

3. Gary Matthews Jr.
First off, some praise—his catch last year was one of the best in the last 15 years.  Some non-praise—he is 32 years old and 2006 was the first time he was even above average for a full season.  Some team is going to give him a four-year deal and will be wondering why, in 2010, they have a 36-year old 5th outfielder hitting .226.

2. J.D. Drew
Drew has now managed to alienate fans in Philadelphia, St. Louis, Atlanta, and L.A.  Next year, he gets to introduce his new team and fanbase to the patented “limited to pinch hitting duties for a week with a cramp” that he has performed to perfection in his career.  Just read the always hilarious Dodger Blues’s take on Drew leaving to get an idea of what it’s like to have this guy on your favorite team.  The fact that the Red Sox are considering signing him is potentially the most fantastic story of this offseason.  Drew would break down into tears by the end of the first week.

1. Daisuke Matsuzaka
$51 million just to talk to a guy.  The bar has been set high this year.