Three days before Christmas, it was going to be quite difficult to come up with a Top 7 list that was not Christmas-related, so I just went ahead and milked this year’s holiday for all it was worth.  It’s a question as old as Christmas itself—what Christmas character would have been the best at a sport?  Just as a bonus, here is some other #1s on potential Christmas-related Top 7 lists—the best Christmas candy has to be those Milky Ways shaped like soldiers, the best Christmas song is Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas Is You, and the best TV show Christmas special has to be the first-ever episode of the Simpsons.  Hey—Merry Christmas everyone!
 
7. Ralphie Parker, Skeet Shooting
It’s a little-known piece of trivia that Ralphie won the Gold at the 1954 Olympics after practicing with his Red Ryder for years.  That’s the miracle of IMDB.

6. Frosty the Snowman, bobsledding
Frosty is this list’s JD Drew.  He has all of the talent that you could possibly want in a bobsledder, and even has the video to prove his potential.  The only problem becomes that you don’t ever know when guys like Drew will get hurt, or in Frosty’s case, melt.  He’s just not reliable enough to put him any higher on the list.

5. Rudolph, triple jump
I don’t even know why.  Bear with me here.  Kevin McAllister’s sport would have also been skeet-shooting, John McClane couldn’t have “terrorist hunter” as his sport, and Gizmo playing chess just seemed stupid, which is really saying something for a list like this.  So it’s Rudolph in the triple jump.  Done.

4. Ernest, goalie
He saved Christmas, so saving shots on goal would seem simple to good old Ernest.  He’s also a versatile athlete, and could easily have been included on this list as a basketball player as evidenced by the movie “Slam Dunk Ernest,” also known as “the single greatest motion picture of all-time.”

3. Scrooge, NFL analyst
Scrooge would definitely find touchdown celebrations a disgrace, trash talk unsportsmanlike, discuss T.O. for hours per week, and praise the Mannings non-stop.  It’s surprising that Fox doesn’t give him a spot around the holiday season.

2. The Grinch, free weights
He could lift all of Whosville’s gifts while being pulled down a giant hill.  It’s safe to say that Grinch would dominate any possible weightlifting competition that you threw at him.  He would even make for a tremendous interest story for every sportswriter who has ever penned a David Eckstein column.  They jump all over the prototypical “gives all he has” articles for someone whose heart grew three sizes in one day.

1. Santa Claus, pro wrestling 
The Revolting Blob became Principal Anderson in Billy Madison.  Santa is without a doubt a former pro wrestler himself.  He has reindeer to escort him to the ring, plenty of catch phrases for promos and merchandising purposes, and an enormous potential storyline if he would ever turn into a bad guy (Good God!  Santa isn’t giving presents!  Good God!)  In the 80s WWF, this fat ass would have been huge.