It’s often said throughout baseball circles that it takes a certain type of personality to be a closer.  “Normal” players might not be able to handle the pressure associated with being entrusted to lock down the most difficult three outs of the game, so those players with the rare combo of great stuff, a short term memory and a “unique” personality typically get the nod. 

In the setting of a traditional baseball game, those personalities don’t get many opportunities to shine, so closers are forced to get creative.  These days, they’ll buzz their hair into a Mohawk or choose some 80’s glam rock song to blare over the sound system when they come out of the bullpen. 

In the formative years of the specialty relief pitcher, they expressed themselves via a different avenue – their facial hair. 

Never was this more apparent than from 1977 through 1988 when Major League closers did for the mustache what hockey did for the mullet.  During 11 of those 12 years, the league leader in saves sported either a mustache or an ax-murdered quality beard (Dave Righetti was the lone clean shaven save leader) and of the 24 Rolaids Relief Awards that were given out, 22 of them to were taken home by men with above average lip dusters. 

And we’re not talking about your standard “I forgot to shave today” mustache. In a little over a decade, the best relievers the Major Leagues had to offer produced some of the most notable facial art in sports history. 

It was simple, if you were to become a dominant closer, first you had to have a dominant upper lip.  

Classic Closer Mustaches
Rollie Fingers

 

Thanks to some creative use of mustache wax, Rollie Fingers crafted what is arguably the most memorable facial hair in recent baseball history.  Hitters that were supposed to be focused on the pitch instead were busy trying to figure out why a Civil War reenactor was standing on the rubber. 341 saves later, Rollie and his curly cues are sitting in the Hall of Fame.

Goose Gossage



If Rollie Fingers’ stache was like an opera - carefully crafted with an artistic elegance – then Goose Gossage’s was like a thrash metal song – wild, aggressive and basically meant to scare the shit out you.  Goose’s yellow handlebars made it look like he’d just slammed a barrel full of Busch beer and forgot to wipe the froth off his mouth. Dan Quisenberry

 

When it comes to baseball, Quiz will always be remembered for two things – 1.) the sidewinder delivery that baffled batters throughout his career and 2.) his absolutely massive pile of whiskers.  If God appreciates mustaches as much as I’d like to think he does, then Quisenberry is doing just fine in heaven. Al Hrabosky

 

No one got more mileage out of their crazy mustache antics than Hungo.  Talking to himself on the mound, the pounding of the glove and the animal-like facial hair all worked in tandem to take a mediocre pitcher (97 career saves) and turn him into a household name.  In St. Louis he rode his popularity to a long time gig as the primary color man on Cardinals telecasts.  I’m not shy about saying that I think his work on the broadcasts would be greatly enhanced if he still had his fu manchu.      Dennis Eckersley



From the time he rose to prominence as a closer in Oakland, to his final days a decade later in the bullpen of the St. Louis Cardinals, Eckersley stood strong.  Sure, by the time 1996 rolled around most of the league had abandoned the old fashioned mustache for grunge-inspired goatees and other new fangled looks, but he wasn’t about to forgot what got him to where he was.  So dedicated to the symbol of the closer was Eck that he adorned his lip blanket for eternity in his Hall of Fame plaque.  John Franco



Italian guy born in Brooklyn closing out games for the Mets?  It wasn’t even a question of if John Franco was going to have a mustache, rather how much pasta sauce it would be able to absorb in one sitting.Todd Worrell

Everything in the late 80’s was a little skinnier.  Look at the neckties people wore for God’s sake.  So it wasn’t a shock when Todd Worrell debuted with the Cardinals as a rookie late in the 1985 season featuring a slimmed down version of the classic Goose Gossage handlebar look.  With his slot amongst the facial hair elite firmly established the previous postseason, Worrell became a dominant closer saving 36 games in route to the 1986 Rookie of the Year award. Ax Murderer Beards

Jeff Reardon



Three years ago Reardon walked into a jewelry store in a mall, handed the clerk a note claiming he had a gun and proceeded to rob it. Take a look at that beard and tell me you’re surprised.  Safe to say, intimidation was part of the reason Reardon dominated the league for ten years.

Bruce Sutter 



Imagine the thoughts going through the heads of batters when they had to face Sutter with the game on the line.  It’s a crucial situation and in jogs this guy who looked like he’s fresh off of a nap in a downtown St. Louis dumpster.  Then he’d uncork a fastball that fell through a trap door as it was approaching the plate.  A split finger fastball and an uncontrollable beard?  Good luck hitting that.  
 
While there are still a few throwbacks left in modern baseball (we’re looking at you Todd Jones), for the most part, the connection between the dominant closer and facial hair has faded with time. Whether they wore the meticulously manicured curly cue or the unkempt serial killer beard, for a historic stretch from the late 70’s through the 1980’s, the key to securing the final three outs of the game became crystal clear – throw away your razor.

JSF Weekly is writtern by Josh Bacott.  If he were Jason Isringhausen, he'd start growing one right now.  E-mail him at josh@joesportsfan.com