The STL Sports Cyber Garage Sale


Ah, the timeless tradition of a garage sale. Nothing beats strolling into a random driveway on a Saturday morning, enjoying the scent of mothballs and quietly sifting through someone else’s garbage while they stare at you. 

But even as uncomfortable as the whole experience is, within that garbage often lies a fellow St. Louis sports fan’s buried treasure. And thanks to this technological wonder we call the “internet”, we can skip over the awkwardness and sort through piles of crap without leaving our couch. 

And when the cyber garage sale meets the world of St. Louis sports, we’ve just gone ahead and anointed ourselves as experts who can advise you as to whether or not your new collector’s item will be worth more than you paid. Sort of like the show “American Pickers” except we aren’t as nerdy as these guys

Item: A classic “Wayne’s New World” t-shirt serving as a tangible memory of the brief time Gretzky spent in St. Louis playing for everyone’s favorite dictator, Mike Keenan. 

Rarity: Despite the fact that he played less than a season in St. Louis, Gretzky memorabilia doesn’t seem all that hard to find.  Log onto eBay and take your pick.  That said, it’s not everyday that when we say “memorabilia” we mean a cartoon version of the greatest hockey player of all time aiming a wicked slapper at the Arch. 

Not exactly something you can buy at your local sporting good store in 2011. 

Target Audience: Bloosiers who maintain such a passion for their team that they still want to reminisce about that glorious 31-game stretch where The Great One wore a Blue Note on his chest…and subsequently forget about the one game where his turnover at center ice led to a brutal double OT, series-ending goal by Steve Yzerman in the ’96 conference semis.  Selective memory can be a sports fans’ friend.

Curb Appeal: Suppose a potential customer is cruising by in his pickup truck that features numerous “Bleed Blue” stickers, there might not be many items that can cause him to hit his breaks quicker than a glance at the baby blue eyes of cartoon Wayne.  If only the shirt could toss a wink out at the Bloosiers passing by, we might have a spirited auction for the item…or a flat-out brawl.  Depends on whether you’re serving your customers complimentary cans of Busch. 

Comparable Items: A Chuck Finley Cardinals t-shirt (if you can find one).  Sure, Finley may not have been as big a name as Gretzky, but if you ever wanted a caricature t-shirt of a player whom the home town team acquired midseason only to lose in the playoffs, then see him bolt, Chuck’s your man.

Special Promotion Suggestion: Package this beauty up with the Gretzky figurine and you’ve got a heated competition to see who will place the highest bid for that package.  As an added bonus, the figurine gives a visual tribute to the ugliest uniforms the Blues have ever worn. 

Appraised Value: Wayne’s handsome mug, the Arch arising out of some bizarre doorway, a cheesy pun based off of an SNL skit to tie it all together…you’ve got yourself a prize.  Pick it up online, run it through an industrial cleaning process a few times then haul it down to the Scottrade Center with a $18 sticker on it and you may have just made yourself a few bucks profit.

Twitter: @jbacott


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