The St. Louis Cardinals are officially out of puns.
Like most mainstream outlets and organizations, the St. Louis Cardinals love a good play on words. Puns make production and consumption easier, they say. That way, people have to think less. It’s easy. And there’s nothing that makes a headline writer happier than a baseball player whose first or last name can be sandwiched in the middle of a sentence.
You want examples? Fine.
- Another Holliday Weekend
- Cards Get Bogged Down
- Carpenter Crafts a Masterpiece
- Tyler Greene with Envy
- Freese Breaks Cold Streak
Undoubtedly, David Freese was the chief subject of last year’s puns since it worked on so many levels. The latest duke of the double entendre has been starting pitcher, Lance Lynn. After all, Lynn’s last name parlays upon the success of Jeremy Lin, who stared for the New York Knicks this past season.
Lynncredible, Just Lynn Time, Lynn-conceivable….and, of course, Lynnsane in the Membrane. No seriously, that last one is real. Click on the link. We dare you.
The amount of puns involving Lance Lynn’s name are nearly infinite. Some might say, to Lynnfinity and beyond. Hiyooooooo. Anyway, it appears that our preconceived notion of Lance Lynn pun availability was entirely inaccurate. There’s a ceiling and the St. Louis Cardinals just reached it on the new cover of Gameday Magazine.
We’re not even looking for clever insertions of Lance Lynn’s name. The Cardinals are literally taking up magazine cover real estate to explain puns now.
We eagerly anticipate another successful fall for David Freese and the subsequent headline, “YOU SEE, A WINTER FREEZE IMPLIES COLD WEATHER, BUT THE GUY ON OUR TEAM NAMED FREESE HAS A NAME THAT SOUNDS LIKE FREEZE. ANYWAY, HE’S TOTALLY HOT.”