Sources: New Bounty System Already in the Works at Rams Park

06
Mar
2012

Gregg Williams hasn’t even been on the sidelines as a member of the Rams coaching staff, and he’s already generated more controversy than any of his predecessors in recent history. 

The alledged “bounty system” that he spearheaded during his time in New Orleans is currently under investigation by the NFL and there’s a significant chance the Rams will be on the hunt for a replacement in the near future. 

But there’s no denying that Williams’ influence may have been passed along to the Rams defensive players even before training camp begins.  He’s their new coach, they want to get on his good side.  So when he handed out a sheet that outlined the customized criteria for the new bounty system being installed at Rams Park, they had to take note. 

Luckily, we were able to snag a copy before they were shredded to avoid any potential penalty by the NFL’s lynch mob:

St. Louis Rams 2012 Bounty System:

1.) $1,000 if you are able to break up a pass aimed at the guy you were supposed to be covering

Though it confused some cornerbacks on the Rams roster who didn’t realize they too were allowed to catch passes from the opposing QB, it was a good way to incentivize their role.

2.) $1,000 if James Laurinaitis’ neck muscles trip an opposing player on their own

Trust us, it can happen.

3.) $10 reimbursement if you brought in a package of Bounty paper towels. 

C’mon, the defensive meeting room isn’t going to clean itself, guys.

4.) $1,000 if you can steal Gregg Williams’ “Flair Hair” visor off his head during practice

 

5.) $10,000 if you catch Coach Fisher snoozing in the locker room and buzz off a chunk of his upper lip hair

This one actually applies to everyone on the staff too. It’s like the team’s white whale.

6.) $10,000 if you’re one of the people on the medical staff responsible for carrying the stretcher and you purposely drop the guy that was just put on it.  Bonus: $5,000 if it reaches 100,000 views on YouTube.

7.) $500 if you take it easy on the offensive line during practice just to boost their confidence a bit. 

After last year, they need a little pick-me-up.  Bradford might double that if it works out.

8.) $1,000 if you knock the locker room TV out of commission the next time a Sam Bradford Charter commercial comes on. 

Just as along as you use the money to buy a new flat screen to replace the old one.

9.) $15,000 if you “accidentally” run over Chris Berman at the Pro Bowl

Applies to any NFL player, really.  Partially because the ultimate goal is to get Berman to close his yapper, and partially because there’s a pretty good chance no Rams make the Pro Bowl.

10.) $1,000 if you catch an interception, then promptly hold a meeting with the wide receivers to explain how to catch a football that is thrown at you

Something tells us this one won’t be paid out anytime soon.

With Williams likely out for an extended period of time, it’s now back to the original bounty for the Rams players – that boring old “win games and you’ll eventually get more money” system. 

Not creative at all, people.

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