The Frank Haith Saga: A Jayhawk in Sheep’s Clothing

It took only a few short days for Mizzou fans to start recognizing that the enemy in the Frank Haith investigation looked very familiar.

Over the last 24 hours, what was rumored to be a substantial notice of allegations against Haith during his time at Miami, has been flipped on its head when the NCAA came out and publicly acknowledged how bad they had bungled their investigation of the University of Miami athletic programs.   So badly in fact that they have put the Miami case on hold and are rolling out an investigation of their own NCAA Enforcement Program.

Who was leading said Miami investigation you ask?  We’ll let this little nugget explain…

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Ok sure, the lead investigator was Abigail Grantstein who was also the girl who was fired from her job after her meathead boyfriend started spouting off on an airplane about why Shabazz Muhammed would never play for UCLA (he is, by the way). But why is Abigail an enemy of Mizzou?

One look at her LinkedIn profile and we had our answer…

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Having spent time working in a straight and narrow institution such as the KU athletic department while earning her KU law degree, there is no doubt that Ms. Grantstein had a sinister smile creep across her face when the file labeled “Frank Haith” was dropped on her desk.

The two teams may never play basketball again, but she had the power to kick Mizzou in the junk once more for old times sake and she wasn’t about to let that opportunity go to waste.

Oh sure, we recognize that it’s a substantial leap of faith to presume that an NCAA investigator was petty enough to veer way outside of her procedural limitations all in a desperate effort to throw the book at a man simply because is affiliated with her arch rival. But if the NCAA Enforcement Program has taught us anything over the years, it’s that using scant – and sometimes illegally obtained – evidence to draw wild, sweeping conclusions despite the inability to prove any of it…well, that’s completely acceptable when it comes to college sports.

The only thing that we don’t understand is how she got the job at the NCAA when she showed up to her interview dressed like this.

St. Louis Teams Joining the Twitter #Boobment

With 2013 only one month old, we’ve already seen the first of what promises to be many social media phenomenons go mainstream and sweep across the nation.  Just like Facebook originated on college campuses, so too has what’s now known as the #Boobment on Twitter.

If you are not familiar, the concept isn’t hard to grasp – college women put on their school licensed apparel, take a picture of their strategically-covered-so-as-not-to-be-explicit jugs in said apparel and send it to the associated Twitter account to be posted anonymously.  In other words, it’s the perfect concoction for college sports meatheads fans.

Per the recent Huffington Post article, the #boobment was born during the Mizzou-Kansas basketball classic at Allen Fieldhouse last year when a female fan tweeted a photo of her wearing a Jayhawks shirt prominently featuring her school spirit (read: cleavage) under the hashtag #KUBoobs.  Other female KU fans followed suit and the trend was formalized with the creation of the Twitter account @KUboobs, believed by most to be the George Washington of college boob-centric Twitter feeds.

As one would expect, not long after @KUboobs exploded, Mizzou countered with their own version – @MizzouBoobs1 – and promptly engaged in some competitive banter with their arch rivals.   Hell, even local private Jesuit schools have gotten in on the action.

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As the movement has swelled on college campuses it has now begun to spill over into the professional sports landscape.  Within days after the media exposed this booming trend, pioneer fans of two St. Louis sports franchises set out to strategically attack the ballooning market.

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BoobsCards

While the Cardinals remain the undisputed leader in the STL sports hierarchy, their social media boobprint has yet to take hold while their hockey counterpart piggybacked on the NHL season opener to rack up almost a thousand followers before they ever sent out a tweet.   While the photos haven’t started overflowing the inbox for either, the seeds have been planted.

We don’t know how large this trend will grow across the country, but what we do know is that as long as male sports fans remain on Twitter, there will be an audience supporting the #boobment.

In other words, what the hell is taking you so long, St. Louis Rams…